Self Confidence

How to Develop Self Confidence through Self Acceptance

Self-acceptance means acknowledging that you are as you are and being comfortable with it. It doesn't necessarily mean liking every aspect of yourself.

But bear in mind, self-acceptance does not mean giving up on yourself. If some disliked aspect of yourself is important and can be changed, do something about it. There's no point in feeling bad about something you can change, just as there's no point in feeling bad about something you can't!

* What aspects of yourself do you find most difficult to accept? Are there times or situations when you find it harder to be self-accepting than others? If you wish jot down what stops you giving yourself permission to be as you are.

* Use this affirmation: 'I accept my... and my... (the attributes you have underlined). This is me, and I'm wonderful, aren't I?'

* Do you ever feel that your best is never good enough? If you judge yourself as not good enough, no amount of achievement will ever satisfy you. Ask yourself: 'How realistic are the goals and standards I set myself?' There's a paradox here. There's nothing wrong with having high expectations of yourself: low expectations lead to under achievement. But impossible ones destroy your confidence.

* Write down this sentence: 'When I fail to live up to my expectations or fall below the standards I set myself, I tell myself...' Write down the first six thoughts that come into your head. Why are you so hard on yourself? You don't have to be perfect, you know.

* Stop comparing yourself with others. You'll always find people who are better than you at some things, and people who are worse. The only meaningful comparison is between you as you used to be, and you as you are now . No one is better than anyone else, just different. If you lapse into thinking 'I'm not as... (attractive/clever/athletic etc) as.', stop it. Tell yourself, 'I'm a wonderful, amazing being. I'm good enough, and I'm grateful for it.'